For days now, I have been seeing spiders everywhere. They have come to me multiple times in ceremony in the last week, come out of cracks of couches I was sitting on, surrounded me during morning prayers, and followed me down the hallway. Like any good student of the earth, I of course reached out to my resources, but for days, until today in a sweet meditation on a hammock in the beautiful California sun, I couldn’t make sense of it. Maka Ina is trying to teach me about the flow of feminine energy. I have only been asking for years now to learn, but she teaches me as I am ready, knowing how much each being can handle…a divine gift of the feminine. The spider teaches us about feminine energy, creativity, receptivity, patience, and the ebb and flow of life. Last, but most certainly not least on this day, the spider teaches about shadow aspects of oneself. I’m going to be honest, it doesn’t take much reflection for me to peg down learnings from the latter today.
Here’s the thing. I’m in beautiful California having an amazing time with my most wonderful partner and his family. I’m on a much needed break from school, am surrounded by nature and beautiful people, and am more blessed in my life than I could have ever imagined. I spent my first week here being in total bliss…and then…slowly but surely I started feeling this underlying angst creep up on me. Nothing in my environment has changed, and I can tell it’s totally internal. I know exactly what it is…..hear me out feminists, and try not to kill me….it's because my moon time is coming.
I have been on a search- in communication with my teachers, my elders, my friends, Mother Earth, sweet plants of the feminine (like my favorite Mugwort J), books by wonderful authors on feminine energy, women’s ceremonies, women’s health, Greek mythology of the feminine protectors such as Artemis, or the beautiful Roman tale of her counterpart Diana, in search of answers. What is the best way to be a woman in this world? I wish to know for myself. I wish to be an example and teacher for others. I wish to lead those that have lost touch with their good, true and beautiful feminine. I don’t wish to unpack the mysteries that are to be left alone, but to understand enough to help the earth and her people in some way, small or large- to bring my unique gifts and talents to this world. For those of you who don’t know me, it is my passion and my path to work with women and children. In a year and a half, I will have the honor and responsibility of having Dr. before my name. I take that responsibility very seriously, and yet love it with my full heart.
So here it is- what I am feeling today…. I can feel the changes in my being. Women are always changing, we are dynamic. We go through each month with changes in our bodies, our spirits, our minds, and our emotions. To say this is “okay” would be a disservice. It’s a gift. The steadiness of the masculine would become stagnancy with out the dynamic energy of the feminine. The changes in our being offer us different perspective, greater connection with the unconscious in ourselves, and a more tangible connection with Spirit every moon. We are specially made to identify and release any stagnant patterns in all of our relationships: with ourselves, one other, and our communities.
Sounds amazing, right? So why do our periods so often fall into the dark depths of anxiety, anger, neediness, and manipulation? What are we missing? Most of the women in our modern world were not taught to honor and pay close attention to their cycle. Our needs change as we do. We live in a world where it is often unacceptable for women to take more time for themselves around their moon time. We are stuck in patterns of comparison with men. But we are not men, and thinking we should be is leading our world into chaos and destruction. The feminine and masculine need to be balanced, and we are living in a divine feminine crisis.
Each month as women, until the beautiful transition into eldership, we go through creative cycles with our physical cycles. Regardless of if we are pregnant and carry physical creation in our bodies, we go through a creative gestation. Then, when we bleed, it is time to bring forth our creativity and birth it into the world. This is a gift of the feminine. What creativity do you love to bring forth in the world? What ideas were you thinking about every day in the first half of your cycle? Maybe you don’t know…the trick with all of this is that we need silence to find the answers. Not just physical silence. Physical silence is a start- but a deep internal stillness that allows you to hear what you truly want from life: your dreams, your destiny, your passion. Finding this space quickly is a practice…but we can start daily with meditation, prayers, time alone, and nurturing ourselves.
When we do not honor the truths of our body and our feminine energy, we become dis-eased, and it is bound to come out around our periods, when our unconscious is so very tangible and has a chance to touch our surface. The woman who craves self-care and love that she is not giving herself will become needy. The woman who is not bringing forth her creativity will become depressed. The woman who is not listening to herself will become manipulative with others, and the woman who does not take time to slow down will become snappy and angry with those around her. This, my friends, is what we call PMS. Yes, it is fixable, with a combination of physical, spiritual, and emotional care.
So here is a guide to start:
· Honor your feminine. Honor your divine feminine spirit, your womanly body, your changing emotions. Just notice the things you do in your life to cut down yourself and other women or the feminine in men as well, and then start to replace those thoughts and actions with affirmations and positivity.
· Sit for a while in silence every day. Start with even 10-15 minutes. Even the busiest of us has this much time. Quiet your mind with breathing or anything else that helps you. I have a few great resources for meditation on my resources page :)
· Notice your changes, and welcome them. There is a purpose to all of it.
· Mentor yourself. Notice that you are getting anxious or bitchy around your period? Ask yourself this. First- what do I need? We always know what we need if we will just listen. Second, is there something that needs to come forward here? Remember that our moon time is a beautiful time for bringing things that have been hiding in our shadow to the light, whether they involve just you or a relationship with other people. Remember to be respectful of others in this process. They may not understand why you have had a sudden change of heart.
· Care for your physical body. Naturopaths are great allies for this. Sometimes changes in diet, lifestyle, hormone modification and a supportive environment can go a long way.
· Follow your creative cycle. Set aside some time around your moon to bring creativity into this world, whatever you love!
We have really reached a time where it is so imperative for us as women to honor our cycles and our feminine bodies. We can bring so much beauty into this world if we just honor the sacred within!
Here are some of my favorite resources right now if you want to learn more!
· Women’s Medicine Ways by Marcia Starck
· Wild Feminine by Tami Lynn Kent
· Woman as Healer by Jeanne Achterberg
My Resource Page for Meditation and Breathwork, and Spiritual teaching resources.
Others to consider:
· Talk to your female elders! They have such a wealth of information to share!
· Look for Women’s Moon Lodges around your area, or commune with other women around your moon time
May today bring you peace and health!